Simon FitzKit...In The Field!

Word up!

October 3, 2008
Leave a Comment The world’s foremost word-mapping program. So cool. I made the ones above, but this one’s currently my favorite:


Larry Curly and Mo-Cap

April 8, 2008
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Another Epic Games update:

More motion capture work means more excitement! We got on the evening news, we’re going to get to go to a motion-capture-team party at the sprawling estate house of one of our contacts at the company, and best of all, I have more NDA-sanitized pictures!

There I am in my mo-cap suit, ready to act like a tough guy wearing about twice my personal body-weight in armor.

Here’s a mysterious squiggle of masking tape on the ground of the mo-cap studio. What could it be? An alien chalk outline? The boundaries of an energy conduit we’re about to be sucked into? A Georgia O’Keeffe print?

And this is from down the hall in Epic Games’ in-house mini-gym (it’s how all those game developers stay so buff). You can set the Stair Machine to simulate the steps of famous landmarks. Not just the number, but also the angle of inclination. It’s a little crazy, but not as crazy as the options I’d have programmed in:


February 10, 2008
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Found via Sketch:

A Hobson’s choice is a free choice in which only one option is offered, and one may refuse to take that option. The choice is therefore between taking the option or not taking it. The phrase is said to originate from Thomas Hobson (1544–1630), a livery stable owner at Cambridge, England who, in order to rotate the use of his horses, offered customers the choice of either taking the horse in the stall nearest the door—or taking none at all. It is analogous to the expression “my way or the highway”.

In the 1980s there existed a restaurant popular with students in Cambridge (England). Its name was Hobson’s Choice. The menu was… Dish of the Day.


Well, if they could get away with one restaurant so blatantly based on an obscure-reference gimmick, obviously, I can get away with far more than that.

Fine Dining For The Well-Informed

Come on down to MORTON’S FORK, the cozy little country cafe that’s just off the beltway! Wikipedia says, “Morton’s Fork is an expression that describes a choice between two equally unpleasant alternatives.” And here at MORTON’S FORK, our chef serves up all sorts of equally unpleasant menu options! Scrambled eggs drenched in vinegar! Peanut butter and banana soup! A goblet of menstrual blood! So many things on the menu, you’ll have a hard time deciding. Because they’re just that nasty.
PS: That logo is from the actual MORTON’S FORK restaurant. Yeah, Britain actually creates these things that I want to make fun of. God bless you, United Kingdom.

Or try THE STRANGE LOOP for some slightly different Italian cuisine. Wikipedia says, “A strange loop arises when, by moving up or down through a hierarchical system, one finds oneself back where one started.” Yes, stop on by THE STRANGE LOOP, the home of the bottomless Spaghetti Bowl!

Or what about THE GOLDEN HAMMER, that fancy Chinese place right around the corner from wherever you live? Wikipedia says, “A golden hammer is any tool, technology, paradigm, snake oil, buzzword or similar whose proponents enthusiastically sing its praises. They predict that it will solve multiple problems, including some for which it is obviously not suitable.” Are you hungry? Thirsty? Tired? Bad dancer? Looking for love? Trying to better your backhand? Need to purchase some silver polish but only believe in the barter system and only have Odyssey of the Mind pins to trade? Then order the mu shu pork. We so good it hurt.

And for dessert, stop on by HAVE YOUR CAKE AND EAT IT TOO, where it’s always Buy-One-Get-One-Free Day at the bakery!

…Actually, that last one would probably be pretty damn popular.

PSP: I Love You

January 1, 2008
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I saw this article a while ago, but I haven’t thought about it while able to blog until now.

From the article:
“Users have been reporting that Remote Play has been secretly updated in the last firmware revision. With PS3 2.10, PS3 owners that have a Remote Play-ready system will be able to play any PS1 game on their handheld.”

Yes, that’s right: You can now plug in your PS3, turn on your PSP and play PS1 games on the tiny screen.

…What!? I understand the seductive draw of ports and backward compatibility, I do. It just seems that, at some point, you’re going to reach critical mass…like so:

1) Drop your PS1 game onto the mousetrap.
2) Mousetrap springs, flipping the disc into a balloon.
3) Balloon pops, dropping the book it was under.
4) Book (the hardcover guide that came with Lunar: Silver Star Saga Complete) flattens disc on conveyor belt.
5) Impact disturbs cheerleader pyramid of Lego Star Wars figures, all of whom fall into cup.
6) Extra weight in cup activates pressure plate below, turning on conveyor belt.
7) Disc and book travel down belt, under hanging (pivoting and spring-loaded) pencil. Lunar guide pushes bottom of pencil forward, then passes under.
8) Pencil springs back, rotating so far that its top smacks domino on shelf above conveyor belt.
9) Dominoes tumble, pacing the disc and book below until final domino hits racquetball.
10) Racquetball bounces down narrow wooden chimney and hits pressure plate below, stopping conveyor belt.
11) Lunar guide simultaneously runs into another hanging pencil.
12) The impact knocks over bottle of acid, which spills into torus-shaped tube and drips out onto conveyor belt, just past where disc is held fast by pencil.
13) Acid eats through conveyor belt in circle, and a disc-sized circle of the belt falls down into beaker below.
14) Weight of belt circle and extra acid is enough to activate pressure plate, turning on conveyor belt again.
15) Disc is held still by pencil, but belt moves underneath it. Soon, hole wraps around bottom of conveyor belt and comes up under disc.
16) Disc falls through hole into PS3 below.
17) You left on vacation, like, an hour ago, and you’ve turned on your PSP on the bus to the airport.
18) You may now play KISS Pinball.

1) Turn on PSP.
2) Play Exit.